Between being sick, not exercising the way I normally do, and not paying attention to what I ate, I managed to pack on some unwanted pounds.

My focus and determination took a big hit. In other words, I didn’t care…

Struggling through this mess in my head. I can not be alone in this.

We are not talking huge amounts gained, but I hit my safety number. I wrote myself a letter, that I promised myself to read if I saw 155 on the scale. I wrote this letter when I hit 145. The letter basically is about what it feels like to hit goal, a reminder of all the hard work it takes, the reward of what healthy choices mean, and what to do in the event I hit my safety number.

Yesterday I saw 155 on the scale… DAMN IT!

The letter came out. I immediately reached out to my coach. I want to cry… And I probably will… But I also know I am strong enough to do this… Mostly because I told myself so!

Am I angry at myself? Yes. Am I self destructing? Hell no! You see the other thing I put in my letter is that these ups and down are normal, that beating myself up would not fix the problem, and that I need to pull on my skinny girl panties and get on with it.

Jeesh! I am one bossy girl!!!!

Appointment made, music faced, food being logged…. Letter firmly tucked back in place…. Hmmmm maybe I should change my safety number to 150!!!!!